


In Which Dave and Karkat Vacillate Between Quadrants And Figure Out Their Separate Cultures  And Anatomy

by iAmCastielHearMeRoar (jhooopie)



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Black Romance, Caliginous Romance | Kismesis, Fluff, Flushed Romance | Matesprits, I just really love these two, Lemon, M/M, Meteor shit happens, Meteorstuck, PWP, Pale Romance | Moirallegiance, Smut, bulge bumps, davekat - Freeform, oneshots, quadrants, red rom, those two being cute
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-03-08
Updated: 2016-06-04
Packaged: 2018-03-16 23:16:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,429
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3506384
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jhooopie/pseuds/iAmCastielHearMeRoar
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Some one shots I think up. I love this pairing in literally every quadrant so... If you have any requests, you can comment what you want to see!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. In Which Dave Confessess Flushed Feelings For Karkat

turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering carcinoGeneticist [CG]

TG: hey vantas 

TG: I wanna show you something

TG: come back to our room

CG: JEGUS FUCK DAVE I'M BUSY I CAN'T CATER TO YOUR EVERY WHIM! WHY CAN'T YOU SEEM TO GET THAT THROUGH YOUR STUPID HUMAN THINK PAN?

TG: dude no

TG: this is different

TG: it's awesome

TG: trust me

CG: IF IT'S MORE OF YOUR SHITTY MUSIC IM NOT INTERESTED STRIDER. IM A BUSY TROLL, YOU KNOW. 

CG: I CAN'T ENTERTAIN YOU WHENEVER TEREZI GOES OFF AND LEAVES YOU ALONE. 

TG: Karkat my music is not shitty. You can't say that because you're unqualified

TG: just get your ass back here!

turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering carcinoGeneticist [CG]

CG: YOU IDIOTIC SLIME-SWALLOWING PHLEGM LOBE

 

 

But of course, Karkat finds it hard to deny Strider anything. He heads back to their shared room, growling low in his throat. Just because he's angry with the human, and wished to piss him off, Karkat takes his sweet ass time heading to the waiting Strider, though he doesn't bother to stop and speak with any of the nauseating trolls that inhabit this meteor along with him. He can't tolerate most of them, they make him want to regurgitate all of his food back up his protein chute. 

 Arriving at the plain looking grey door, Karkat cautiously opens it, fully expecting to be ambushed by coolkid. Instead, Dave pushes him straight back out the door. "No kitkat! I didn't think you were going to come, I have to get prepared again. Just wait out here." He insists, excited. "Just a minute Karkle. Calm your tits." He replies to Karkat's exasperated huff. 

"How many times do I have to tell you not to call me those ridiculous nicknames like a buttfuck ignorant wiggler?" Karkat complains, but the blond headed douche bag has already disappeared back into the room. He sighs and leans his back against the wall, sliding down it into a sitting position. "I guess I will just wait here then..."

A few minutes later, a voice calls out from behind the door, finally allowing Karkat inside his own god damn room! The troll walks inside and is completely astounded by what he sees. Dave is standing in the middle of the respiteblock, surrounded by lit candles. Flowers and their obnoxious accompanying scent fill the air, and leave Karkat completely confused. Dave is actually, genuinely smiling at him, and he looks a little nervous. 

Dave himself looks wonderful, for having so little time, and being a human and all. He had thrown on that black suit of his from the original session, and his shades have been discarded. The bright red eyes that are normally obscured scan Karkat's face anxiously. He doesn't look like the over confident, ironic asshole that he usually does. "Strider... What the actual fuck is all of this?" Karkat asks, astonished. Cool kid looks crestfallen. 

"W-what do you mean?" He asks, hurt radiating from his voice, though Karkat could tell he was trying to hide it. "This... Karkat... I like you..." And then he understood everything. 'God Karkat, you fucked up!' He reprimands himself. The grey-skinned teen knows that he has to salvage this situation, and fast. He can already see those weird clear human tears welling in Dave's eyes. 

"Fuck Dave! That's not what I meant!" he explains hastily, then steps forward, wrapping his arms around Dave's skinny waist. Karkat presses his lips against the human's and oh, he never knew it would be this heavenly. Their lips mold together and feel as if they were made to fit each other. Their bodies slot together like they've done this hundreds of times before. Nothing has ever felt so right to Karkat. He wants to stay here forever, suspended in this moment. 

Dave is the one to break the kiss first. "So does that mean you feel the same way?" He asks lightly, a smirk painting his face. Karkat just answers with a kiss. 


	2. Force

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> No more troll titles. I, for some reason, am not good at troll titles. So sorry if you liked them!
> 
> Prompt from halyconMechanist
> 
> Karkat is forced into stripping and Dave is the manager of the club, who comforts Karkat when he finds him crying.

Karkat is 9 sweeps old, and he has been recruited. No, not for any army. That would have been a whole lot better. He was recruited to work in a strip club. 

It was not his choice, nor would it have ever been, no matter how poor he was. Mutant bloods are rare. Mutant bloods bring in money. Mutant bloods can't get any decent work. 

Karkat was taken in one day when he got into a minor bicycle Crash. He bled a little, and found he could not conceal his blood color. And of course, there was a club recruiter present. Just his luck. Immediately upon spotting his blood color, the clubber pulled Karkat to the side, offering to "help" him. 

Tonight is only Karkat's third performance. He wasn't given any formal training, only told to "Watch what the others do and copy them." After a few days of this, he was told he was ready to dance. 

The announcer comes on and Karkat's heart races. He vaguely hears the words over the pounding in his chest. "Next up is our delicious mutant blood! He's Karkalicious, it's our very own Karkat Vantas!" The music starts and Karkat walks on the stage, wearing a pair of tight candy red shorts beneath a pair of rip-off dress pants, with a "tie" around his neck. 

He begins to gyrate his hips, slowly at first but then he moves a little faster. He pulls the pants off, revealing the tight little trousers. The crowd makes some noise as he twirls around the pole at the center of the stage. Karkat slides down, wiggles ass for good measure, and then slides back up. The rest of the routine is more or less like this, with money raining on the stage and filling the barely-existent places between the cloth and his bare skin. 

The audience had clearly had a good time, however, Karkat had not. As he deposits the money he had taken in at his station and grabs a robe, he dodges some of the others who try to talk to him and finds a relatively quiet place. The troll slides down the wall in his dark corner and lets his red-tinted tears slide down his cheeks. But before any more tears can fall, an unexpected but not entirely unwelcome hand is brushing them away. 

Karkat looks up to the shaded face, trying to see behind the sunglasses. Even though he is unable to do so, Karkat still recognizes the man in front of him. It's Dave Strider, human co-owner of the club. "What's wrong?" He asks quietly. Karkat sniffles. 

"I don't want to have to do this." He whimpers. Dave looks sympathetically at him Before scooping Karkat up in surprisingly strong arms. 

"Okay. I'm going to take you out of here, then. This recruiting stuff is bullshit if you ask me." He says. Dave's slender finger brushes Karkat's cheek once again. "I won't let you get hurt."

One month later and Karkat has hope once again. He's been living with Dave ever since that fateful night, and they're happy together. 

One year later and Karkat has found a decent job. He barely remembers the terror of working at the club anymore. He only remembers Dave. That night was the best day for both of them, and is only trumped by the day that Dave proposes, and Karkat accepts. 


	4. Cuz Baby You're a Star

“Okay KitKat, you can’t just start naming the stars dumbass troll shit, okay? On Earth the stars were all named cool shit, and like, named after the Greek gods, so maybe we should name the stars after all of us, since I guess we’re this world’s gods..” Dave trails off as he lays back in the long grass, staring up at the multitude of stars that cover the night sky. “That one can be Karkat.” His voice is a quiet murmur when he points to the biggest and brightest star he could see. Dave didn’t much expect Karkat to be a-o-fucking-kay with that, exactly, but hell, he was trying to be romantic damnit.

Karkat huffed, rolling his eyes, “I don't get why you want to name some fucking stars anything, there was no reason for any troll to name a huge ball of fucking heated gas a billion miles away something special.” 

“Actually, lightyears, is the correct term-” Dave butts in, in the manner in which he always does, being a complete and fucking unapologetic asshole about it. “But listen, it would be cool, right? For like, years, people will look at the fucking stars, Karkat. The stars. And they’ll be all reverent and shit when they look at it because first of all, we are their fucking gods, right, I wanna be the Pope, by the way, the fucking Brope, the coolest of Popes, but like, they look at the stars and they think of us, Karkles, us!” Dave says, and though he’s rather excited, he is able to keep his tone to it’s normal stoicism.

Karkat looked at him, “Did you even understand half of the words you said? As far as this world cares, you’re a god, and I’m not. I never reached god tier, and I doubt a god of blood would be worth shit anyway, much less a star named after him.” 

Dave gives Karkat an incredulous look, which then immediately hardens back into the mask he normally wears, though perhaps the slightest hint of- sadness?- peeps through. “You know Karkles, I was trying not to think about that one, there. You know, that one little point you made there, I was trying to keep that shit on full fucking lockdown, like a bank, but one of those good banks that’s like, really hard to rob. I wanted to be a fucking government building so that the rest of my brain wouldn’t know what the fuck that one thought right there was or even that it existed, okay, I was perfectly fucking happy letting my brain become a fucking Freud happyland, okay?” Dave insists, his voice getting louder with every word that comes out, despite his attempts to keep himself quiet and not worked up like this. “Because yeah, I’m a god. And you’re not. And you’re a mutant blood. Which means I’m going to be living a lot longer than you and honestly, no, that’s a thought that should be burned, burned like a nice young Catholic boy would burn his first ever cumrag if he actually gave a shit, you know? Like, thinking about you dying is so not fucking okay, I can’t even express how fucking not okay it is. I was perfectly okay with it remaining a non-issue for as long as I could but-”

Karkat reached over and papped Dave’s face, “Shoosh.” And Dave shushes, because since when could he ever say no to Karkat? Karkat nodded, satisfied he had gotten Dave to shut up, and pointed at a small cluster of stars, “Strider.” 

Dave looked where Karkat pointed, biting his lip so he doesn’t go off on another tangent yet again and ruin this moment again. “Not even Dave? No senpai to go after that? Are you sure? I’m pretty sure this new world of ours needs to know how fucking awesome I am.”

Karkat rolled his eyes, “I’m sure I heard something about one of your worlds star formations being called Cancer after me. Didn't give me the courtesy of having either of my names. You’re lucky it has your name and not douche muffin.” 

“Aw, Karkles, you wouldn’t call me a douchemuffin. You love me too much!” Dave pretends to swoon and leans in for a dramatic kiss. Karkat didn't stop him, instead returning the kiss completely, and moved back to his position in the grass afterwards with a small smile. 

“You’re wrong, but what the fuck ever. Human naming traditions for pointless shit like this is easy. That one can be Bright Fucking Piece Of Shit That Could Wake You Up If It Glowed Through Your Goddamn Window and Make You Unable To Sleep Ever Again.” he pointed at a bright star just above the Strider cluster, and hesitated for a second as he looked at the first star Dave had pointed out, “And I guess that could be Karkat.” 

Dave looked at Karkat once again, shades sliding down on his nose so that Karkat got the full force of his bright maraschino red eyes staring at him in, once again, an incredulous manner. “Dude, don’t troll movie title the stars man. Ya gotta have like, chill names that are easy to remember. Like Dave. Dave is a perfectly good and awesome star name that is easy to remember and also put a story to, because there has to be a story behind stars. Like, how the star got there. So, like, Karkat, right? Well, you see, there was this amazing troll, he was super hot and also angry but mostly hot, right? And he wasn’t ever really a god, but a god loved him, a super important god. So when Karkat died then Dave, the god who loved him a lot, put him in the sky so he could always remember him.” Dave gives an awkward shrug, “Shit like that.”

Karkat stared at him, before he frowned and sighed, “Fuck, ok. Fine, it can be called Glowy. Is that short enough for you?” 

“Sure. But like, what’s the story? Why is Glowy there?” Dave inquires, smirking.

“Because it fucking is bright as shit and won't stop glowing like an asshole buzz creature with a light in it's ass.” Karkat growled. 

“Don’t bully the stars, Karkles, it isn’t nice. You might seriously injure that star’s self esteem, and now he’s gonna be sad, and the star isn’t gonna glow very bright, and then it’s gonna fall out of the sky and hit you upside the head for being an asshole.”

Karkat laughed, “Stars don't have genders you wiggler piece of shit.” 

“Do you want to fight me about that, my friend?” Dave asks, his smirk turning into a grin.

Karkat shook his head, looking back up at the sky, “No, let's just name these fucking stars like you took me out here to do.” He moved over closer to Dave and wrapped an arm around him, nuzzling his head against his side, purring. Dave hummed happily in his throat and pressed his side into Karkat’s. He goes on a long monologue, basically naming half the stars by himself as he goes along. Mostly, he’s just happy to finally have a quiet, happy night for the first time, really.


End file.
